I think I need a long walk.

Just for air. Just to take a breather. Just to feel like I still exist. That I'm still myself.

I can't tell if this is all spurred by the events of last night, but it made me realize lots of things. Things that I've kept buried deep in the back of my mind. While I was hoping they'd all pass, the stress just kept accumulating and now it's out. Although it feels like a bomb's been dropped on me, I feel like there's more to come. It's like all the accumulated stress is just slowly coming out in bursts but still continuously coming out nonetheless.

I think tonight is a sort of good thing. A little get-away from all of this, more or less. Yea, I'm going to enjoy myself tonight and just chill. Hopefully. But before all that happens, I need to pull myself together right now. Just thinking about random shit today while I wasn't distracted made me close to tears. In my opinion, it's pretty pathetic to be unable to let it out. At all or in general. It's a pretty sad concept.

Hm, it's 2:40PM and we were supposed to be at Target's/post office. Guess I'm not going home 'til my mom gets home. Plans later: go home, shower, get ready, and party. I really hope my dad doesn't pick me up. I want to stay in the city a little longer. I want to look like a tourist and take pictures in NYC at Times Square, at night. It just sounds so lovely, right?

Not really. You know what day I'm definitely looking forward to? The day HPDH comes out. I don't know or care what time I'm staying out until. But by then, most or all final decisions will be made and I can relax for good. By then, hopefully, the only thing I have to worry about is getting stuff done instead of starting. Starting is the most difficult part but then so is finishing.

Thinking about it, I really can't wait until after Nov. 15th. I don't know why, but I have a feeling the future events will be splendid. Oh, snap. When I get home, I need to remember to charge my camera. Low battery. And I need to update my 365 more. It's not that I don't take pictures daily. It's not that I've stopped. Oh no. It's just that I haven't had the time or I haven't made it a habit just yet.

This weekend was a slow, painful blur for me. I just hope I don't have to go through a weekend like that ever again. Oh yay, I'm left all alone in the English office. Sorta, not really. I should take that walk before something bursts.

Oh, note to self: ask Horin how to get to Brooklyn Bridge park. Alone.

Edit: this looks like a long rant. Whoops.

I have always walked alone,

A crossroad, living by myself.

But this time you said you would take me away,

To some corner, just you and me.